How I soloed...

[Soulbourne]

I decided to write down my stories of what I soloed here.


Story 1: Onyxia


Now, as you all know, Onyxia is a mighty Dragon Queen. Once it took 40 mighty heros to take her down. Now it can be done easily by ten, one on the other hand, is another story.

So, I was walking through Stranglethorn Veil one day, when I somehow got lost. Well, next thing I knew, I was in the main chamber of Onyxia's layer. Lucky for me though, she was taking a midday nap elsewhere at the time. So I decided to look around while she was gone, In found many interesting things at the time, but that's neither here nor there.

I had just found a Complete Fishers Guide by Nat Pagle, and was about to find the location of an item that had the power to eradicate the scourge entirely. Right then though, Onyxia walked back in. Naturally we were both stunned to see each other there. But that peace didn't last long. Pretty soon ax, fire, and shadow bolts were flying everywhere. Most of them missed utterly.

We finally got towered and decided to end it in one match. Onyxia suggested we play poker. So, I got out my cards and found out Onyxia has great eyesight and even better dexterity with little things. Being a warlock, I had a natural advantage thanks to a, uh, "strategic information gathering orb", which I just called an Eye of Krillog.

So, after 7 rounds and many great poker faces, I finally won. Onyxia decided to have a dramatic death and pulled out a asp the size of the Valley of Strength in Orgrimar, and had it kill her with famous last words: "As I die, a great artist dies with me." Plus a few curses towards me.

All I can say it was a great day, and Onyxia really concentrated on those cards since she didn't notice my eye looking over, uh, under her shoulder.

*** Information added 1124 Minutes and 38 Seconds later... ***

Story 2: Ironforge


So I was walking through AQ40 talking to all the bugs to see what they had to say, they've got some pretty interesting info you know, and I got lost. Next thing I knew when I looked up, I was in front of the Gates of Ironforge.

Now, I was about to run, but wouldn't you know it, the dwarves there saw me just as fast as I saw them. The dwarves must be anti-blood elf or something, then again, I guess most of the alliance is racist against Horde since they can't let the past go like Thrall wishes, because they then ran out in force to take me down. Huge wall of dwarves coming out to crush me under their heel, hundreds of them.

Thinking quickly, I chose to escape through the tram between Stormwind and Ironforge. I then ran straight into battles! It was a viscous battle, axes, shadowbolts, hammers, bows, fire, portals to the nether, and other stuff flying everywhere.

I finally managed to pierce their first defenses with all those dwarves. So, after making it past the gates, I encountered a militia of sorts-every hero in old Ironforge!

So, I took the natural course of action...

I lifted my foot..

Took one step forward...

And then...

Ran for my life!

Ten minutes and three healthstones later, I made it into a large room out of sight of the heroes. Sad part, there was about two-hundred of them still searching outside so I decided to take a look around. First thing I notice is a big fancy throne. The next thing I notice is a short guy in full plate with an ax across his lap sitting in said throne.

I did the only thing I could with those heroes still out for blood. Raised my hand and said "Hi."

Lucky for me, the King was tired of ripping apart elves who happened to stray in. So we talked for a bit and decided to have a contest: Who's lackeys were stronger. We also made a bet that winner gets to live.

He called out four of the biggest dwarves you've ever seen. Big piles of muscle, all 4'2" of them!!! I decided to call out my succubus for the first contest just to embarrass them.

She broke a nail.

Round one: Dwarf King

I called down my Infernal for the next round. The dwarf went stone form turning into a mini infernal except for the flames. The next round was a who could break through a three foot(~one meter) thick wall of diamond. While the dwarf beat through with a hammer, my infernal did what it's kind do best: Run in a straight line with nothing able to stop it!

Round two: Me!

Next up was a test of endurance. I called in my Felguard for this one. After some pleasantries, they started beating on each other. Now they might tell you different, them dwarves, but the skin of a Felguard is surprisingly resistant to a dwarven hammer. Now dwarven flesh againts a demonic ax however...

Round 3: Me.

The final round was a test of who just plain outpowered the other. I called in a mighty Demon general: A Doomgaurd. It was pretty mad at the time and ran around killing everything. The King said "You don't control it." He never got past "do" before I had enslaved it to my will and said: "You were saying?"

Round 4: Me!

So, I bet your all wondering just how that got me out of there and how I still didn't solo Ironforge. Well, as it turns out, there's a curse over the city that when activated, kills everything within for two hours. Guess what button I got to press!



Now for those who saw the little mislogic there, when I died I made sure t use a Soulstone to revive. I then went over to the tram and left, having soloed Ironforge! Hey I was still the last person standing...

Now, after getting on the tram, I went to Stormwind, but that's another story entirely!

*** Information added 0 Minutes and 46 Seconds later... ***

Interesting...turns posts into edits...

[Absalom]

Im assuming the card you were holding when you won the poker match was Lunacy?