How women are treated as gamers - Page 3

snackereen · June 22, 2007, 08:58 AM

As a male, I experienced several "strange" behaviours, playing my human female priest, but I blame adolescence for that ;).
Our guild leader is female, too, and we have several girls/women in our guild. I like those mixed teams, although gender does not really affect my playing-style and/or behaviour.
I think I like women in gaming a bit more towards men, because they don't act like idiots as (unfortunately) too many males do.

They seem to get the phrase: "it's just a game" much faster.

edit: spelling

Maestrofeo · June 22, 2007, 09:07 AM

32 married Male here with... 7 years of MMOs behind me and I've played both male and female toons (I tend to alternate each time I create a character), and actually my last main in EQ was female and my current main in WoW is female (the fugliest undead priestess you did ever meet!!). I do the same in my role playing games, where I swap sexes quite frequently either because my character idea suits one more than the other or if I've played one sex "for too long".

As for treatment, my female toons did receive a little more generosity at low levels but for the most part, I find people generally just assume that I'm male. My guild in EQ (for 5 years) was about 60/40 Male/Female and our guild leader was a woman. Other than a few dramas over the years that are just going to happen when you have couples playing or people of mixed sex meeting in RL, there was really no difference I found in how people were treated. I have flirted, in fun, with male toons while playing my female ones (only ever with people I know) but I always make sure they know I'm a guy before they get too far gone. Normally after being refered to as "doll", "sweety" or "darlin' "...

On the subject of the gamer girl fantasy, my wife does not play any computer games at all and is more of an arts and crafts type and I'd like to keep it that way. So while she scrapbooks, sews, etc, I kill evil monsters on the computer and I like it that way. It's my time and I admit that if my wife were online, she would get preferential treatment from me which isn't always a good thing in a guild environment. She's picked up enough of the lingo to understand when I'm grumbling over a failed instance attempt or cheering about some uberloot and she loves it when she comes to say goodnight and I get distracted and we all die cause I'm not healing anyone (heroics sans healer suxxors the big one). I lub my Eebol woman!

Lileana · June 22, 2007, 09:51 AM

female player here. many many times if someone finds out i am a girl, i get the auto /flirt or something stupid along those lines. for the most part however i've never been excluded or put down for being a girl gamer.

i can say there have been times when i've been in a raid with ALL males, and never once felt put down, or excluded or had anyone step over the line. i have been often asked to 1. giggle some more on vent. 2. talk some more on vent. 3. asked repeatedly 'does this offend you?' - usually then met with the response of 'no' they say 'ok i'll try harder, lol'..

i find that many guilds actually welcome female gamers b/c of the sensed lack of them...i say sensed as there are probably more than we know but most think (me included) that females are the minority in this game. It is fun to raid with a gender mix - who wants to be in a sausage fest?

KJ · June 22, 2007, 10:44 AM

I am a girl and my guild knows it. I never speak on TS/Vent. When I was leveling I always had help and I think it was becasue I was a woman. My guild doesn't treat me any different than the rest (over 18 guild, pretty mature) but I wish I had lied and said i was a man from the beginning. I think because I have 7 brothers (I am the only girl, other than my mom) and I have a potty mouth and have no problems taking control of a bad situation (Except in AV, what a bunch of wellll.....my battle group is odd at times) and am often accused of being a man because of my behavior at times. It used to be annoying and I even used to defend my "Chick" status but my guildies know the truth and thats all that matters.

Aimealamort · June 22, 2007, 10:44 AM

well, i must say i'm pleased that my first new thread has been so successful

!

i haven't really come across many situations where my sex came into play, the only time really was when i was talking with another newbie that was in my group at the end of sfk, about the game and how we were doing with it. the other people in my group were a little surprised when i said my boyfriend got me into it. one of them whispered me and asked if i was gay!

when i told them i was a girl, they were cool with it, though still surprised. of course, i got a couple "oh man, you should talk to my girlfriend and get her to play", which is what seems to happen a lot.

my boyfriend's little brother thinks its so awesome that i play, especially that i still do, because my bf quit right after i started.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiralyn

But when you get into 'real' games, or anything on a computer, suddenly you are shunned. I know this first hand, from my own friends. I'm open about it with people I know. All my friends know that I'm tied up on raid nights, but I'll be at happy hour with them on Thursday. Sometimes it feels like a double life.

this is quite true, i do think that the reason there arent a lot of girl gamers could be because of the stigma attached to gaming. playing a game on a computer specifically labels a person as a 'nerd' or something similar, and i believe that some women are subconsciously or consciously afraid of what others would think of them. i know i feel less cool when my friends stop by and want to go out, and im geeking it up, most of the time i tell them to wait or catch up with them later, because im in the middle of an instance or something. but it doesn't bother me at all, because i enjoy the game.

Carlinda · June 22, 2007, 10:46 AM

I'm a girl, and I was actually surprised at all the attention I don't get in game. My boyfriend has been playing a lot longer than me, and warned me when I started that I'll probably get hit on a lot once people discover I'm a real-life girl. But I can only think of one or two examples of another player hitting on me just 'cause I'm a girl, and part of that might also be because I play a gnome, and girl gnomes are kind of adorable. I've never recieved free items or extra drops based on my sex that I know of.

In contrast to some of you noticing differential treatment between your male/female toons, that surprises me. I can't recount how many times I've been referred to as "dude" in parties, and all of my characters are girls. I find most people assume you're a guy unless you state otherwise, regardless of your toon's sex.

I'm lucky enough to be in a guild with a good real life guy/girl ratio, with our guild master being a girl who plays male characters. I prefer groups with a good mix of both sexes, which isn't too hard to find on my server. I do agree that girl players tend to be more articulate and polite, and that can help dilute the superman tendencies of a lot of guys in game. In general, I think WoW may be one of the few platforms in which guys and girls truly work together for a common goal, instead of against each other.

Kirium · June 22, 2007, 10:55 AM

I had something funny happen in a PUG recently.

I had died quite a bit due to our tank really sucking and I got a tell from our priest teasing me about it.

We were chatting back and forth and I said something about being AFK for a sec, because my wife had a question. I then got a tell that said "yea, my boyfriend is always bugging me when I'm playing as well." I assumed of course this was a woman, no big deal.

Finally, since our PUG sucked I told them to get on our guild vent. Ends up the one with a boyfriend was a guy.

No big deal, but it did throw me off for a second.

Zxanath · June 22, 2007, 11:21 AM

I may be in a slightly unique situation. I'm in a guild with both my husband and my son. We all play together. And especially my son is very quick to let people know that "That's my rl mom you're talking about, so watch what you're saying". This especially to newbies in the guild that don't know us yet. I get flirted with a lot, but mostly to tease my husband. I do my fair share of flirting as well, and always get threatened to be reported to my husband. But it's all in good fun. Only once did anyone treat me differently because of my sex (which is obvious as I use vent all the time). One guy didn't seem to care that both my husband and my son were also in guild.

Also, many of my guildies have met me, and some more will meet me very soon. Once a year we do an "Unplugged" weekend and all go camping together. We come from all over the US and Canada. This year we're doing the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, OH. We spend a couple days camping, drinking, playing football and poker and generally getting to know each other, then go back to our online relationships knowing a bit more about the people behind the toons. And after these weekends, I'm well loved as I bring pie and do a lot of cooking.

They way to a gamer's heart is through his stomach! Oh wait... that's not how that saying goes, is it?

Morella · June 22, 2007, 11:51 AM

I'm a female playing all female toons, and while I have had a couple PUG instances where vent got pretty quiet after the first time I said something, I have very rarely had an issue within WoW with being treated differently. I have been in the same guild since starting WoW over a year ago, and while we didn't have many female members to start, as we have grown, we have come to have a rather high female count compared to other guilds on the server - our guild focuses on membership for families, couples, and adults that have committments irl but still want to play/raid/endgame with a good group. So they all know I'm female, and believe me, they don't treat me special for it. I roll on epic loot just like everyone else

As for the slightly annoying treatment you get randomly, sure, /ignore goes along way. Of course, I'm 32...so they usually go away pretty quickly after I tell them that, lol.

Devicus · June 22, 2007, 11:58 AM

Our guild's number 2 is a female. She's an awesome healer? what else? Um. Most of the girls I play with tend to be less confident in their abilities. I only know a few but it's the case. Our female guildies are treated nearly exactly the same as the males but then their BF/husband is usually also in guild or around too. Speaking of number 2... her best friend in game is a 17 year old guy, though so was the guy she kicked from the guild for harassment, and forgave, 2 times before he got kicked for good.

They get spoken about the same way we would anyone else would behind their back. "I'm well please with *****, he's coming along nicely as a tank. I think *** doesn't enjoy healing anymore though. This could be a problem. Yeah, she's good, maybe she just feels she isn't?". Well except we use different pronouns.

As gamers on the whole. It depends. I think that assuming the /ignore morons, it's their choice how they project. Discounting morons that is.

June 22, 2007, 08:58 AM	#21 (permalink)
snackereen pesky beast Character Info Snacker 70 Gnome Warlock Zirkel des Cenarius Euro RP Guild: Heavens Fall Profile: Blizzard Armory Talent Spec: 27/34/0	Re: How women are treated as gamers As a male, I experienced several "strange" behaviours, playing my human female priest, but I blame adolescence for that ;). Our guild leader is female, too, and we have several girls/women in our guild. I like those mixed teams, although gender does not really affect my playing-style and/or behaviour. I think I like women in gaming a bit more towards men, because they don't act like idiots as (unfortunately) too many males do. They seem to get the phrase: "it's just a game" much faster. edit: spelling Last edited by snackereen; June 22, 2007 at 09:03 AM..

June 22, 2007, 09:07 AM	#22 (permalink)
Maestrofeo Lurker Character Info Maestrofeo 40 Gnome Warlock Stormrage US PvE Guild: The Big Bang Talent Spec: 5/26/0	Re: How women are treated as gamers 32 married Male here with... 7 years of MMOs behind me and I've played both male and female toons (I tend to alternate each time I create a character), and actually my last main in EQ was female and my current main in WoW is female (the fugliest undead priestess you did ever meet!!). I do the same in my role playing games, where I swap sexes quite frequently either because my character idea suits one more than the other or if I've played one sex "for too long". As for treatment, my female toons did receive a little more generosity at low levels but for the most part, I find people generally just assume that I'm male. My guild in EQ (for 5 years) was about 60/40 Male/Female and our guild leader was a woman. Other than a few dramas over the years that are just going to happen when you have couples playing or people of mixed sex meeting in RL, there was really no difference I found in how people were treated. I have flirted, in fun, with male toons while playing my female ones (only ever with people I know) but I always make sure they know I'm a guy before they get too far gone. Normally after being refered to as "doll", "sweety" or "darlin' "... On the subject of the gamer girl fantasy, my wife does not play any computer games at all and is more of an arts and crafts type and I'd like to keep it that way. So while she scrapbooks, sews, etc, I kill evil monsters on the computer and I like it that way. It's my time and I admit that if my wife were online, she would get preferential treatment from me which isn't always a good thing in a guild environment. She's picked up enough of the lingo to understand when I'm grumbling over a failed instance attempt or cheering about some uberloot and she loves it when she comes to say goodnight and I get distracted and we all die cause I'm not healing anyone (heroics sans healer suxxors the big one). I lub my Eebol woman!

June 22, 2007, 09:51 AM	#23 (permalink)
Lileana Member Character Info Lileana 70 Warlock Azjol-Nerub US PvE Guild: Guildless Talent Spec: 43/0/18	Re: How women are treated as gamers female player here. many many times if someone finds out i am a girl, i get the auto /flirt or something stupid along those lines. for the most part however i've never been excluded or put down for being a girl gamer. i can say there have been times when i've been in a raid with ALL males, and never once felt put down, or excluded or had anyone step over the line. i have been often asked to 1. giggle some more on vent. 2. talk some more on vent. 3. asked repeatedly 'does this offend you?' - usually then met with the response of 'no' they say 'ok i'll try harder, lol'.. i find that many guilds actually welcome female gamers b/c of the sensed lack of them...i say sensed as there are probably more than we know but most think (me included) that females are the minority in this game. It is fun to raid with a gender mix - who wants to be in a sausage fest?

June 22, 2007, 10:44 AM	#24 (permalink)
KJ Member Character Info KJ 70 Human Warlock	Re: How women are treated as gamers I am a girl and my guild knows it. I never speak on TS/Vent. When I was leveling I always had help and I think it was becasue I was a woman. My guild doesn't treat me any different than the rest (over 18 guild, pretty mature) but I wish I had lied and said i was a man from the beginning. I think because I have 7 brothers (I am the only girl, other than my mom) and I have a potty mouth and have no problems taking control of a bad situation (Except in AV, what a bunch of wellll.....my battle group is odd at times) and am often accused of being a man because of my behavior at times. It used to be annoying and I even used to defend my "Chick" status but my guildies know the truth and thats all that matters.

June 22, 2007, 10:46 AM	#26 (permalink)
Carlinda Member Character Info Carlinda 70 Gnome Warlock Daggerspine US PvP Guild: Crimson Dragoons Profile: Blizzard Armory Talent Spec: 41/3/17	Re: How women are treated as gamers I'm a girl, and I was actually surprised at all the attention I don't get in game. My boyfriend has been playing a lot longer than me, and warned me when I started that I'll probably get hit on a lot once people discover I'm a real-life girl. But I can only think of one or two examples of another player hitting on me just 'cause I'm a girl, and part of that might also be because I play a gnome, and girl gnomes are kind of adorable. I've never recieved free items or extra drops based on my sex that I know of. In contrast to some of you noticing differential treatment between your male/female toons, that surprises me. I can't recount how many times I've been referred to as "dude" in parties, and all of my characters are girls. I find most people assume you're a guy unless you state otherwise, regardless of your toon's sex. I'm lucky enough to be in a guild with a good real life guy/girl ratio, with our guild master being a girl who plays male characters. I prefer groups with a good mix of both sexes, which isn't too hard to find on my server. I do agree that girl players tend to be more articulate and polite, and that can help dilute the superman tendencies of a lot of guys in game. In general, I think WoW may be one of the few platforms in which guys and girls truly work together for a common goal, instead of against each other.

June 22, 2007, 10:55 AM	#27 (permalink)
Kirium Member Character Info Muirik 70 Human Warlock Archimonde US PvP Guild: Dead Presidents Profile: Blizzard Armory Talent Spec: 47/13/1	Re: How women are treated as gamers I had something funny happen in a PUG recently. I had died quite a bit due to our tank really sucking and I got a tell from our priest teasing me about it. We were chatting back and forth and I said something about being AFK for a sec, because my wife had a question. I then got a tell that said "yea, my boyfriend is always bugging me when I'm playing as well." I assumed of course this was a woman, no big deal. Finally, since our PUG sucked I told them to get on our guild vent. Ends up the one with a boyfriend was a guy. No big deal, but it did throw me off for a second.

June 22, 2007, 11:21 AM	#28 (permalink)
Zxanath Member Character Info Zxanath 70 Undead Warlock Kargath US PvE Guild: Radiant Faction Profile: Blizzard Armory Talent Spec: 42/9/10	Re: How women are treated as gamers I may be in a slightly unique situation. I'm in a guild with both my husband and my son. We all play together. And especially my son is very quick to let people know that "That's my rl mom you're talking about, so watch what you're saying". This especially to newbies in the guild that don't know us yet. I get flirted with a lot, but mostly to tease my husband. I do my fair share of flirting as well, and always get threatened to be reported to my husband. But it's all in good fun. Only once did anyone treat me differently because of my sex (which is obvious as I use vent all the time). One guy didn't seem to care that both my husband and my son were also in guild. Also, many of my guildies have met me, and some more will meet me very soon. Once a year we do an "Unplugged" weekend and all go camping together. We come from all over the US and Canada. This year we're doing the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, OH. We spend a couple days camping, drinking, playing football and poker and generally getting to know each other, then go back to our online relationships knowing a bit more about the people behind the toons. And after these weekends, I'm well loved as I bring pie and do a lot of cooking. They way to a gamer's heart is through his stomach! Oh wait... that's not how that saying goes, is it?

June 22, 2007, 11:51 AM	#29 (permalink)
Morella Registered Character Info Morella 70 Human Warlock Draka US PvE Guild: Ad Nauseam Profile: Allakhazams Talent Spec: 7/44/10	Re: How women are treated as gamers I'm a female playing all female toons, and while I have had a couple PUG instances where vent got pretty quiet after the first time I said something, I have very rarely had an issue within WoW with being treated differently. I have been in the same guild since starting WoW over a year ago, and while we didn't have many female members to start, as we have grown, we have come to have a rather high female count compared to other guilds on the server - our guild focuses on membership for families, couples, and adults that have committments irl but still want to play/raid/endgame with a good group. So they all know I'm female, and believe me, they don't treat me special for it. I roll on epic loot just like everyone else As for the slightly annoying treatment you get randomly, sure, /ignore goes along way. Of course, I'm 32...so they usually go away pretty quickly after I tell them that, lol.

June 22, 2007, 11:58 AM	#30 (permalink)
Devicus Member Character Info Devicus 80 Gnome Warlock thunderhorn Euro PvE Guild: Ultra Cohesion Profile: Blizzard Armory	Re: How women are treated as gamers Our guild's number 2 is a female. She's an awesome healer? what else? Um. Most of the girls I play with tend to be less confident in their abilities. I only know a few but it's the case. Our female guildies are treated nearly exactly the same as the males but then their BF/husband is usually also in guild or around too. Speaking of number 2... her best friend in game is a 17 year old guy, though so was the guy she kicked from the guild for harassment, and forgave, 2 times before he got kicked for good. They get spoken about the same way we would anyone else would behind their back. "I'm well please with ***, he's coming along nicely as a tank. I think * doesn't enjoy healing anymore though. This could be a problem. Yeah, she's good, maybe she just feels she isn't?". Well except we use different pronouns. As gamers on the whole. It depends. I think that assuming the /ignore morons, it's their choice how they project. Discounting morons that is.